It's a title of one of Keane's song since I can't come up with one right now. It's not really an uplifting song if you see the words but the rhythm is just amazing I can't help not to grin when I was listening to it the other day. I had to make my way to a part of DC I've never gone to before to pick up the tickets for a Keane show next month. Did I tell you I'm excited? I found out they were playing here three days after the tickets went on sale and of course, it was all sold out. I found a bunch of folks selling theirs on craigslist though some cost twice as much as it would have been otherwise. It doesn't leave me much choice and after debating over it, I'm still going *grins Who knows when I'll get a chance to see them again....
I had a volunteer work to do again but that wasn't til 7 pm. I just walked around again and sat by the Dupont Circle just watching people pass by, looking at their clothes mostly. Just getting ideas. Speaking of clothes, why do people go to the gym wearing jeans and leather shoes? That's such an odd thing to see. Ah well, I guess they still go so that counts for something. Last week was a first where I went six days straight so yay. Instead of stopping by the house to get changed, I just put my clothes in the car and go straight to the gym after leaving the train station. Saves me some time I suppose, though I usually just sit and do nothing when I have the time. My ex-military buddies laughed when I told them about 'me' time at one point. It's something I've been doing since I was younger. If I have to go somewhere, I can't just wake up, shower and leave.I usually get up an hour or two before I leave, giving me time to just sit and lay there. Conserving my energy, as I used to tell my mom.
The volunteering went fine. It was at the food bank once again, though it was more people than usual so the hour just flew by. We pretty much pick out what they want and bag it for them, so it kinda feels like I'm a shopper for other folks. It is good though I might take a break from doing it since it's in DC and it takes me about an hour to get home once it's done with. It starts at 7, and I get off at 3:30 so really can't go home since the traffic is insane if I do choose to drive on my way to the food bank. One of the guys I ended up talking with on the way back to the train station so that was nice. Oh before the shift started, I went to McDonald's and grabbed a Big Mac Meal though had to rush eating since I had like 10 minutes to finish up. I just overheard a woman and I can't help not to laugh when she told her friend how she stutters when she gets excited. It just put a picture in my head though some folks who might have seen me just thought Why is this kid laughing by himself? Been doing that more in the metro too but that's because of My Name Is Earl. I've downloaded the first season in my iPod and watch it on my 15-min commute. His brother's just hilarious. The things he says.... "Yeah I'm glad she's not dead any more. Being dead is definitely worse than being alive. When you're dead you can't do all the cool stuff you can do when you're alive. You and I, we can do all kinds of cool stuff cuz we're living, we're not dead, we're alive. If we were dead we wouldn't be able to do all the cool stuff we can do, becuz we're alive. Dead people can't do cool stuff. Only people that are alive can do cool stuff, cuz they're living, and you have to be living to be able to do cool stuff. You have to be alive. Yeah, 'cept when you're alive sometimes bad stuff happens too. Like sometimes you can get into a car wreck, or you can have a headache or twist your ankle or even stub your big toe... So being alive is kinda hard too, but I think it's definitely better than being dead..." It definitely is though at one point...
Going back to Monday this week, I'm not sure what happened but this "good feeling" just came over me when I was in the kitchen. I was getting pissed since my roommate didn't do his dishes again. A little after, the feeling was there and the annoyance just went away. I dunno if having gone to the gym might have done that, but I went back to my room smiling and everything. I got close to calling people to say hi but opted not to. Call and tell them I thought about them? Nah, I've cut back doing that. It works two ways but sometimes it's frustrating having to always reach out. I wonder if that's one of my role, doing that just because with no rhyme or reason. But then, it's to my benefit I suppose. I'm the one who feels good having done so. I just got online and talked to a few folks at least, while having a beer. My friend I was texting told me I was the pissiest guy he knows. I seriously have to use the bathroom every so often when I drink, reason why I don't get drunk too easy. My system flushes it all right out.
Aside from that, it's been quiet but good. I spoke to the family few days ago since it was my aunt's birthday. The line was busy so I ended up calling my mom and using up all the damn phone card. Haha, it's all good though. A ten-minute call ended up being an hour long. I was just checking with her to find out a possible date for her to fly. I didn't realize she's only leaving after the one-year anniv of my cousin's death. He was her favorite and she was his. I think about him from time to time and whenever I see his pictures, I can't help not to get sad. He's only 30, but then he kinda brought it upon himself, drinking pretty much everyday. You'd think, with having his mom and dad and a brother and sister, he'd be on a straight path but that wasn't the case. He had everything growing up but things happened and he just gave up on life. He got conned about going abroad few years. I'm not sure what the gist of it was, but I don't know about having that dream, to go abroad. Dunno, maybe I'm taking being "abroad" for granted but eventhough I was mixed American, it wasn't my dream to come here. To an extent maybe, but that was only to meet my dad which as some of you are aware I didn't see 'til I was 16. But before that, I wasn't really wishing to move to the U.S. It'll be brought up sometimes by people, since they wonder why I'm not with my own kind.
I just wasn't much of a dreamer, I suppose which can be good and bad. Even my mom, she pretty much dreamed about coming to the U.S. all her life and now it's finally happening. From there, what happens next? It might not sound like it, but I'm glad that that's over. It took two years to get it all taken care of, and she was telling me how people were amazed that I petitioned her in such a young age. Most people wait until they're established in the US before petitioning their parents while I did it as soon as I'm able to. They were getting on my nerves about it so soon as I turned 21, filed in the paperwork. I wanted to get it over with also since ya know, it would gnaw me if I didn't. It's family.. The ones who did abroad did the same and pretty much supported me so my way of showing payback maybe? Way to show them all they did wasn't in vain. They're great, though we don't get along sometimes, well they don't at least haha, I stay out of it all. My mom told me that when things happen, the rest of the family told her not to let me know about it. I still find out though, I have my way with making my mom talk. She tells me that they're scared that I'll get mad, coz it's rare that I do. They know that if that happens, it'll be different from then on. Knowing I have this power over them, tsk tsk. Oh dear, I'm starting to sound evil. Well time to go. Until next time...
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