This blogsite has been acting funky from what I've been told so will have to look into it more later on the day.
This was me on my drive back from the reunion on my dad's side I went to two weeks ago. My hair was going to be longer now but I bothced the top of my head shaving it the week before, so ended up going with a skinhead.
I actually had a great time, knowing a little bit more about our background. Got to meet family from all over, even have family up in Brooklyn, and finally met my first cousins which was my main concern. One of them was cute too hahaha I wanted to hug him but had to settle for a handshake since he was eating when I woke up and met him in the kitchen damnit damnit damnit. I'm over it now *siicck Some of the pics are a bit blurry but my mom has yet to send me the rest. OOpps, almost forgot, here's the link
Have a great Thursday of what it's left for some!!!
Thursday, August 31, 2006
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
Best buy..
Ok, I went to Best Buy this morning to grab one of my all time favorite shows, Arrested Development :D If you haven't watched it, give me a reason why not hahaha People who knew me in person would know how much I loved this show, I was a spokesperson for this show at my old workplace. I had people sit down and watch some episodes and they ended up liking the whole thing. How great is that!! I just have this thing where if I enjoy something, I make sure people I know check it out as well. I get pissed if they don't hehe
When I was at the store, I saw that all the Seinfeld boxed sets are on sale too. Each box was selling for $19.99 so now I'm tempted to get the whole thing. I've seen the syndication and find myself laughing when I watch it on telly (sounds smoother than saying tv) I'm really thinking of picking some up along with Strangers with Candy. I gotta stop being a harharhar
I've been tagged by JaG and would have to get back to her with that. I have to put down things that she doesn't know about me, so here's one of the those. Something I do when I'm bored. Maybe some others too, if they'd admit to it. It's history lesson time, here's what it says:
When Philippines was discovered by Magellan
They were sailing day and night across the big ocean
Until they saw a small Limasawa island
When I was at the store, I saw that all the Seinfeld boxed sets are on sale too. Each box was selling for $19.99 so now I'm tempted to get the whole thing. I've seen the syndication and find myself laughing when I watch it on telly (sounds smoother than saying tv) I'm really thinking of picking some up along with Strangers with Candy. I gotta stop being a harharhar
I've been tagged by JaG and would have to get back to her with that. I have to put down things that she doesn't know about me, so here's one of the those. Something I do when I'm bored. Maybe some others too, if they'd admit to it. It's history lesson time, here's what it says:
When Philippines was discovered by Magellan
They were sailing day and night across the big ocean
Until they saw a small Limasawa island
Magellan landed in Limasawa at noon
The people met him very welcome on the shore
They did not understand the speaking they have done
Because Kastila gid at Waray-Waray man
When Magellan landed in Cebu City
Rajah Humabon met him, they were very happy
All people were baptized and built the church of Christ
And that’s the beginning of our Catholic life
When Magellan visited in Mactan
To christianize them everyone
But Lapu-Lapu met him on the shore
and drive Magellan to go back home
Then Magellan got so mad
Ordered his men to camouflage
“Mactan island we could not grab
‘Cause Lapu Lapu is very hard”
Then the battle began at dawn
Bolos and spears versus guns and cannons
When Magellan was hit on his neck
He stumble down and cried and cried
Oh, mother mother I am sick
Call the doctor very quick
Doctor, doctor shall I die?
Tell my mama do not cry
Tell my mama do not cry
Tell my mama do not cry
That’s the end of Magellan
in the island of Mactan long time ago
ladies and gentlemen
Saturday, August 26, 2006
Breaks my heart to say
A flood of emotion rushed over me after receiving an e-mail from my mom yesterday. Well, she sent me an e-mail since she thought there was something funky with the ATM card that she has. It's actually my card that I gave her so that she can get some cash out when she needs it on one of my accounts. I just do transfers to it every month insted of sending through Western Union and paying about a 10 % fee everytime. What happened was she checked the balance and saw that 6, 000 pesos (about $55) got deducted from it since the last time she took some money out around the middle of July. It really would not have bothered me too much just seeing what had happened so far. However, when she mentioned that she about went mad trying to figure out where the money went and just cried and cried not knowing what to do. Normally, I would feel bad hearing about that but instead, all that welled up inside me was anger which doesn't happen too often. It's rare that I get really angry but with the mother situation, it has been bottling up since the beginning of last year. I'm gonna write, I wouldn't say a bit, since I tend to spill my heart out when I do post.
As some would know, I was born to a Filipina mother and an American father twenty three years ago, July '83. My dad was in the Navy at that time, and got stationed in Korea few months after I was born. During his time in Korea, he met an American woman, P which soon became my stepmother, a year and a half after I was born. I don't remember the exact dates but after they got married, they ended up staying in Korea/Guam (?) until it was time for them to move back to the states in '87. My mom on the other hand moved back to her parent's house, a single mom with a son from a G.I. The only memory I have of my dad is swimming at a hotel pool with him, while I swim under the water while someone throws a lollipop and I try to get it. I think that was when I was about 2 yrs old, and it so happens to be my first memory as well. After they moved to California, my dad got out of the Navy and that's when he stopped supporting us. You'd think by then, my mom would get a job at least, to provide food for the table but instead she came to an agreement with my Grandma that she'll be the housekeep when my Grandma left for Norway to work. My Grandpa (the one that just died) used to be in the merchant marines and that was how he acquired Norwegian citizenship which he passed on to my Grandma. That is an Asian culture thing, some family members go abroad to help provide to their family which what happened in my case though the ones who were left behind didn't even get a job. In the house that we moved back to, I have two uncles, one younger auntie, an older auntie, with her husband and three kids in one part of the house and my grandpa and of course my mom. So that's all of us living together in one house. It had its ups and downs, and drama that went along with it.
One of the main things was my mom who had me, but with no husband. Add to that, that it was with a foreign guy who married somebody else after I was born. So that made me a bastard who in noooo way could pass for a Filipino. I think when I realized that I don't look like everybody else, that's when the sense of not belonging start to creep in. I did know my father, but after '87 the communication pretty much stopped. He never wrote after that, and it would always have to be us that initiates the phone calls on holidays and such. I didn't know anything about him, didn't know what his likes or dislikes were, didn't even know what he did for a living after he got out of the military. That kinda bothered me, I felt embarrassed getting asked by people what I'm doing in the Philippines if I was American, or what is it that my father does. Anyway, getting back to my Mom she pretty much took my Grandma's role, taking care of the house, cooking food, doing laundry, etc etc pretty much something a maid does now that I think about it. She says she did this so she can provide for me which I did believe and was thankful for at one point.
During those years we lived with the rest of the family, there'll be times that my grandpa or my uncle would get drunk and verbally abuse my mom, or even slap her or kick her out of the house. I don't remember being verbally abused but even if I was, I might just have blocked those times to protect myself. We stayed at other relatives' house for a bit, though a few days after, my mom would make the choice to come back to the house since she had "nowhere to go." This went on until I was about 13 yrs old. If you would have seen me at school, you wouldn't think that this kind of stuff was going on at my house. I kept a brave face, and I think I was too busy trying to please my dad. Trying to elicit some sort of response saying Hey, you're doing well in school son, I'm proud of you or even something to acknowledge my existence. I did really well in school, winning all sort of competitions, math, history, journalism, even part of the school dance team. There really was little I can do about the things that were happening. I just stayed out of everyone's way and kept my mouth shut.
I was hurting. I remember very vividly, being in the second grade and crying about the way my life was. There's a song that they used to play every morning before the flag ceremony called Maghintay Ka Lamang (Just Wait) by Ted Ito and there you'd see me in the corridors, looking out to the square, head over my arms, crying and telling myself to hold on, that things will get better. It was growing up that I put my mom up on a pedestal, and vowed to make her life better than the way it was. She blamed my dad for everything that had happened, if he hadn't done this, if he wouldn't have done that, our lives would be so much better. If he sent us money, it wouldn't have to be like this. Money money money. She used to tell me how she was getting ready to go abroad when she met my father, and how everything turned out the way it was after that happened. She used to tell me that she loved me so, but I think being told that her life would have been a lot different had she not met him, what does that tell me exactly? Eventhough she said she loved me, I felt responsible for the way things turned out and felt a little guilt in being born. I wished I would not have been born to prevent all of these, the pain, the despair, the heartbreak. Well, I blamed my dad too. How could he let this happen to his own son. I even hated God. Eventhough I prayed, I was questioning the existence if there even was God. Why would he let a kid go through all that pain? He's just a child, he didn't do anything to deserve this. Why can't he just have a 'normal life?
I moved to the US when I was 16 and was supposed to live with my dad permanently. It was an amazing feeling, finally getting to meet him after for so long. Weird how I still loved him in spite of all the things he did or did not do. I resented them though, him, my stepmom and my little brother seeing the way they lived. All I could think was fuck this, you guys are living real nice while I had to live in a 11' x 12 ' room with my mom and her husband. Having to take a shower with the rest of the tenants, having to get water from a pumping well. It didn't really bother me before but was a bit annoyed by it I guess after moving to the States. So......
As some would know, I was born to a Filipina mother and an American father twenty three years ago, July '83. My dad was in the Navy at that time, and got stationed in Korea few months after I was born. During his time in Korea, he met an American woman, P which soon became my stepmother, a year and a half after I was born. I don't remember the exact dates but after they got married, they ended up staying in Korea/Guam (?) until it was time for them to move back to the states in '87. My mom on the other hand moved back to her parent's house, a single mom with a son from a G.I. The only memory I have of my dad is swimming at a hotel pool with him, while I swim under the water while someone throws a lollipop and I try to get it. I think that was when I was about 2 yrs old, and it so happens to be my first memory as well. After they moved to California, my dad got out of the Navy and that's when he stopped supporting us. You'd think by then, my mom would get a job at least, to provide food for the table but instead she came to an agreement with my Grandma that she'll be the housekeep when my Grandma left for Norway to work. My Grandpa (the one that just died) used to be in the merchant marines and that was how he acquired Norwegian citizenship which he passed on to my Grandma. That is an Asian culture thing, some family members go abroad to help provide to their family which what happened in my case though the ones who were left behind didn't even get a job. In the house that we moved back to, I have two uncles, one younger auntie, an older auntie, with her husband and three kids in one part of the house and my grandpa and of course my mom. So that's all of us living together in one house. It had its ups and downs, and drama that went along with it.
One of the main things was my mom who had me, but with no husband. Add to that, that it was with a foreign guy who married somebody else after I was born. So that made me a bastard who in noooo way could pass for a Filipino. I think when I realized that I don't look like everybody else, that's when the sense of not belonging start to creep in. I did know my father, but after '87 the communication pretty much stopped. He never wrote after that, and it would always have to be us that initiates the phone calls on holidays and such. I didn't know anything about him, didn't know what his likes or dislikes were, didn't even know what he did for a living after he got out of the military. That kinda bothered me, I felt embarrassed getting asked by people what I'm doing in the Philippines if I was American, or what is it that my father does. Anyway, getting back to my Mom she pretty much took my Grandma's role, taking care of the house, cooking food, doing laundry, etc etc pretty much something a maid does now that I think about it. She says she did this so she can provide for me which I did believe and was thankful for at one point.
During those years we lived with the rest of the family, there'll be times that my grandpa or my uncle would get drunk and verbally abuse my mom, or even slap her or kick her out of the house. I don't remember being verbally abused but even if I was, I might just have blocked those times to protect myself. We stayed at other relatives' house for a bit, though a few days after, my mom would make the choice to come back to the house since she had "nowhere to go." This went on until I was about 13 yrs old. If you would have seen me at school, you wouldn't think that this kind of stuff was going on at my house. I kept a brave face, and I think I was too busy trying to please my dad. Trying to elicit some sort of response saying Hey, you're doing well in school son, I'm proud of you or even something to acknowledge my existence. I did really well in school, winning all sort of competitions, math, history, journalism, even part of the school dance team. There really was little I can do about the things that were happening. I just stayed out of everyone's way and kept my mouth shut.
I was hurting. I remember very vividly, being in the second grade and crying about the way my life was. There's a song that they used to play every morning before the flag ceremony called Maghintay Ka Lamang (Just Wait) by Ted Ito and there you'd see me in the corridors, looking out to the square, head over my arms, crying and telling myself to hold on, that things will get better. It was growing up that I put my mom up on a pedestal, and vowed to make her life better than the way it was. She blamed my dad for everything that had happened, if he hadn't done this, if he wouldn't have done that, our lives would be so much better. If he sent us money, it wouldn't have to be like this. Money money money. She used to tell me how she was getting ready to go abroad when she met my father, and how everything turned out the way it was after that happened. She used to tell me that she loved me so, but I think being told that her life would have been a lot different had she not met him, what does that tell me exactly? Eventhough she said she loved me, I felt responsible for the way things turned out and felt a little guilt in being born. I wished I would not have been born to prevent all of these, the pain, the despair, the heartbreak. Well, I blamed my dad too. How could he let this happen to his own son. I even hated God. Eventhough I prayed, I was questioning the existence if there even was God. Why would he let a kid go through all that pain? He's just a child, he didn't do anything to deserve this. Why can't he just have a 'normal life?
I moved to the US when I was 16 and was supposed to live with my dad permanently. It was an amazing feeling, finally getting to meet him after for so long. Weird how I still loved him in spite of all the things he did or did not do. I resented them though, him, my stepmom and my little brother seeing the way they lived. All I could think was fuck this, you guys are living real nice while I had to live in a 11' x 12 ' room with my mom and her husband. Having to take a shower with the rest of the tenants, having to get water from a pumping well. It didn't really bother me before but was a bit annoyed by it I guess after moving to the States. So......
Sunday, August 13, 2006
Guess we'll never know
It's been a good week settling back to day shift once again. I don't feel like a vampire any longer being awake during the night when I was working mids. After getting back from NY, I had to work that Monday and was off the next three days for my transition to days. I really don't remember doing much, I think I pretty much relaxed at home and not do a whole lot of things. Watch movies, get on the net, read a book? Some movies I saw was Beauty Shop which I thought was funny. I wasn't liking it at first but it was catfish Rita that won me over EEEEEEP! I giggle whenever I remember that scene. Hmm, other movies are Ikiru which has one of the most haunting scenes I've seen so far. It's about this one government worker Kanji who found out that he had six months to live for having stomach cancer. He's been pretty much a workaholic his whole life, and after coming across one of his subordinates Toyo, he tried to actually live with the little time that he had. Splurging his savings (well more of treating himself, not splurge), doing something good for others, and having passion once again for things that matter, and just having fun. It was a good movie , though I got freaked out a bit by the lead actor's eyes in some scenes. I cried obviously, since it's a sad movie and makes you reassess about things in your life. One "joke" in the movie went:
"You've never had a day off, have you?"
"No."
"Why? Are you indispensable?"
"No. I don't want them to find out they can do without me."
Got to see Little Miss Sunshine too, for free! They had a screening at Va Beach and I got to go, though ended up going by myself. I asked some guy a while back to check out the preview to see if it's something he might wanna see, but dunno what happened. Err, I deleted my account from this one site and that's where I kinda spoke to him but yea, his loss. Hahaha It was kinda dark, but hilarious nonetheless. It looks like I enjoy just about every movie that Toni Collette is a part of, though About a Boy is still my favorite with her in it. Her role reminded me of my mom who sorta was the same way but getting back. I believe Little Miss Sunshine is just coming out in some cities so check it out if you may. If you like it great, if not, at least you can say you got to see it (If you didn't, I owe you a movie if I'm EVER in your town)
And saw Strr...strraanngg.. Strangers with... guess you'll never know ;) It's great to finally see Strangers with Candy after waiting close to two months after it came out. It's a prequel to the tv show that came out back in 99 so guess that might be why not too many people are familiar with it. Here's a preview for you lot if you've never seen it. Give you an idea of what the humor is like.
Aside from that, hmm, I really can't say I had a quiet week. I met some new people which was good. It's been a while since I made acquaintances with people that live in the area. I spoke with three people on a Wednesday and ended up meeting two which wasn't bad. I really wouldn't call it a date since it's not. The first one I spoke to was D though he lived about an hour away. It's cool he loved Arrested Development [one of my fave shows EVER] but that's about it, hmm. I just hope he didn't blue* himself. I asked for his number but he said his phone is turned off at the moment. Maybe it was after all but who exactly goes around without a phone these days. He gave me his AOL ID and his e-mail add, so I guess that's still something.
The other one, W wanted to have lunch that same day I talked to him. I got too hungry though so ended up finishing cooking the pot roast which I had prepared the night before. I didn't get to eat 'til 3 something hours after W asked me to have lunch haha. Errr, I didn't think he was cute when he sent me his picture, so I was Hmmm, I'm eating in today! I jus went ahead and gave him my number, see how he is. He was an alright guy after all. I ended up meeting him later on the day when I was at the mall. I was at the mall since I had to pick up a book I had reserved at Barnes and Noble, Feel the fear and do it anyway by Susan Jeffers which I didn't realize until now is 18 years old. So off I went to the mall, but ended up stopping at JC Penney to check out some suits. W said he just happens to be in the area since he had to go pick up a furniture, so figured might as well meet and greet in person. Which we did, probably just for 30 mins or so, as we were checking out the suits, kinda asking the introductory questions. I think I'll be friends with him if nothing else. He said the same thing too, so I guess that's good. He's one who actually hosts little gatherings of friends which is soo not like me. I would, but don't expect me to cook.
The second one, A, he called me up the next day, Thursday to see what I was doing. I didn't get to pick up the first time since I was getting ready to go to a briefing. Just listened to his voicemail message, and I swear he sounded like he's high. I didn't call him back until 90 mins later after getting out of the briefing. We just talked about what I'm up to, what he's doing etc etc. He was trying to find his way to get to the Oceanfront but sorta got lost. I really wasn't much of a help either since I get lost myself around the area. When he said Oceanfront, I thought he meant just walking by the ocean and having lunch or something since it was overcast that day. Instead of going home, I just went straight to Va Beach which is about 20-30 mins from where I was. This made me happy. I kinda got excited meeting new people which is kinda odd. I guess I have my shy moment and aggressive moment coz there are times where I'd up and just ask for somebody's phone number the first time I spoke with them.
Getting back, so made my way to VA Beach and had jeans, polo shirt on because of the briefing. Well with A said going to the Oceanfront, it actually meant getting into the water and going swimming. I didn't intend to swim that day, but after passing by a store, all I thought was I'm here, might as well go all the way (not with the guy!) so went ahead and bought the cheapest swimming shorts and a pair of flip flops. Off back to the parking lot I went, and got changed in my car. Ended up moving to a different parking building since A was about sixteen blocks from where I was. I had to go commando since I didn't have a spare underwear either.
Off to the Oceanfront I walk, but now it was just a matter of finding A. I've been trying to call him for half an hour (probably less) but he's not picking up. If he doesn't call back at this time, I'm just gonna call it a day and go home. I stayed around though, since I didn't wanna waste all that driving and it be in vain. I went down to the area where A said he will be and I was just looking at the people ou in the sun, trying to pick A out. Saw this one guy got out of the water and heading back to the shore. I had a feeling it was A, but really can't be too sure either. Niice, he's cute hahaha The guy went to his spot and sat down. I actually came up to him and uttered Ummm, Are you? Nevermind and walked away. I got nervous since it felt like I was trying to pick the guy up and I wasn't even sure it was him so I went by the lifeguard station and stood there glancing at the guy I briefly talked to. I saw him messing with his cellphone, and seconds later my phone rang. I looked over and the guy had a grin on his face. I knew it was him. I'm just good like that [kiddin!]. I had a great time, well WE did, just letting the waves carry us, swimming, and splashing each other with water. He's really funny so I was laughing most of the time we hang out. Find it funny though, how at first he commented how I didn't look like I did in the picture. He said I looked more buff from the pic which was taken three years ago, which I'll post one of these days. These are things I don't recognize, I've stayed around the same weight for the past three/four years and didn't see much difference really. It's odd, friends and family will say You're skinny, gain some weight. Then, You're fat, go running and do exercise. After A said that, You think so? was all I could utter. I'm fine with my built really, though I got a bit self-conscious after he said that.
After that weird comment, we just went about swimming in the ocean again. A was really friendly, I'd look and he'd be talking to people from all ages, kids, couples, teenagers, grandparents which I thought was sweet. He kinda grew on me, and he was someone I felt I could be friends with, if nothing else. He kept calling me sexy which is a surefire way to make me blush. So there I was, tanned and blushing walking along the shore with A. It was nice, we walked down a good half a mile I'd say just asking each other questions, and talking about random things. He mentioned how my pic doesn't do me justice. All I could say was thanks but I still felt like a fatty hahaha after he said so at the beginning. Ju on beach!! He had to go meet his friend later on the day so we went our separate ways. He said, Give me a hug which I obligingly did, in spite of all the people at the boardwalk. Told him I had a great time which I really did. Spoke to him a little bit after that since he called to let him know he got a parking ticket. His meter ran out and those Va Beach Cops sure do their jobs. Then he called since he didn't know how to get to Olive Garden so looked it up for him. I swear he uttered, That's really sweet like ten times during our two-hour meeting. I probably am, without realizing, but I cringe when people call it out haha I just do what comes natural and I've never been sure as what the line is between doing regular things and being sweet about doing 'em. After I gave him the directions, he had to hang up so that he can concentrate on the road. He said that the traffic's backed up, so on my way home, I stopped by Chic Fil A and grabbed a sandwich. Oh my god! Chic Fil A is sooo good. That was my first time ever having their sandwich and the potato thingies yum yum yum.. Dip it in a mixed ketchup and mayonnaise
sauce, mmm it's sooo good. I was grinning ear to ear driving as I was eating since it was damn good.
I didn't bring my cell with me since it really wasn't gonna take long. It was at that brief period that he called and with me not picking up, assumed that I was angry or something. I'm not avoiding you, I just have to find my way around that's why I had to go. I understood completely about him having to end the convo, but I didn't think of it as him avoiding me. Really haven't spoken to him since then, so will probably call him sometime this week and see if he's paid his ticket yet, or just say hey. He lives three hours away, though he mentioned he's considering moving to the area :D He's thought about this before we met so yeahh..And I might be moving some place else come December anyways.....I'm a bit nervous about calling, Gahh he might think I like him too much.. If I don't call though...guess we'll never know
Ohh..Dad and 'Mom' is coming tomorrow too *Shuxxxx I thought it wouldn't be until midweek at least but will tell more later on. Time conflict and what not.. Got to see a girl I went to tech school with back in '02, eventhough she left VA just this past weekend. Spoke with a friend I haven't talked to for about eight months Gooood times Good times Oh, and Daniel resurfaced too (-_-)
Gotta get some sleep now.
"You've never had a day off, have you?"
"No."
"Why? Are you indispensable?"
"No. I don't want them to find out they can do without me."
Got to see Little Miss Sunshine too, for free! They had a screening at Va Beach and I got to go, though ended up going by myself. I asked some guy a while back to check out the preview to see if it's something he might wanna see, but dunno what happened. Err, I deleted my account from this one site and that's where I kinda spoke to him but yea, his loss. Hahaha It was kinda dark, but hilarious nonetheless. It looks like I enjoy just about every movie that Toni Collette is a part of, though About a Boy is still my favorite with her in it. Her role reminded me of my mom who sorta was the same way but getting back. I believe Little Miss Sunshine is just coming out in some cities so check it out if you may. If you like it great, if not, at least you can say you got to see it (If you didn't, I owe you a movie if I'm EVER in your town)
And saw Strr...strraanngg.. Strangers with... guess you'll never know ;) It's great to finally see Strangers with Candy after waiting close to two months after it came out. It's a prequel to the tv show that came out back in 99 so guess that might be why not too many people are familiar with it. Here's a preview for you lot if you've never seen it. Give you an idea of what the humor is like.
Aside from that, hmm, I really can't say I had a quiet week. I met some new people which was good. It's been a while since I made acquaintances with people that live in the area. I spoke with three people on a Wednesday and ended up meeting two which wasn't bad. I really wouldn't call it a date since it's not. The first one I spoke to was D though he lived about an hour away. It's cool he loved Arrested Development [one of my fave shows EVER] but that's about it, hmm. I just hope he didn't blue* himself. I asked for his number but he said his phone is turned off at the moment. Maybe it was after all but who exactly goes around without a phone these days. He gave me his AOL ID and his e-mail add, so I guess that's still something.
The other one, W wanted to have lunch that same day I talked to him. I got too hungry though so ended up finishing cooking the pot roast which I had prepared the night before. I didn't get to eat 'til 3 something hours after W asked me to have lunch haha. Errr, I didn't think he was cute when he sent me his picture, so I was Hmmm, I'm eating in today! I jus went ahead and gave him my number, see how he is. He was an alright guy after all. I ended up meeting him later on the day when I was at the mall. I was at the mall since I had to pick up a book I had reserved at Barnes and Noble, Feel the fear and do it anyway by Susan Jeffers which I didn't realize until now is 18 years old. So off I went to the mall, but ended up stopping at JC Penney to check out some suits. W said he just happens to be in the area since he had to go pick up a furniture, so figured might as well meet and greet in person. Which we did, probably just for 30 mins or so, as we were checking out the suits, kinda asking the introductory questions. I think I'll be friends with him if nothing else. He said the same thing too, so I guess that's good. He's one who actually hosts little gatherings of friends which is soo not like me. I would, but don't expect me to cook.
The second one, A, he called me up the next day, Thursday to see what I was doing. I didn't get to pick up the first time since I was getting ready to go to a briefing. Just listened to his voicemail message, and I swear he sounded like he's high. I didn't call him back until 90 mins later after getting out of the briefing. We just talked about what I'm up to, what he's doing etc etc. He was trying to find his way to get to the Oceanfront but sorta got lost. I really wasn't much of a help either since I get lost myself around the area. When he said Oceanfront, I thought he meant just walking by the ocean and having lunch or something since it was overcast that day. Instead of going home, I just went straight to Va Beach which is about 20-30 mins from where I was. This made me happy. I kinda got excited meeting new people which is kinda odd. I guess I have my shy moment and aggressive moment coz there are times where I'd up and just ask for somebody's phone number the first time I spoke with them.
Getting back, so made my way to VA Beach and had jeans, polo shirt on because of the briefing. Well with A said going to the Oceanfront, it actually meant getting into the water and going swimming. I didn't intend to swim that day, but after passing by a store, all I thought was I'm here, might as well go all the way (not with the guy!) so went ahead and bought the cheapest swimming shorts and a pair of flip flops. Off back to the parking lot I went, and got changed in my car. Ended up moving to a different parking building since A was about sixteen blocks from where I was. I had to go commando since I didn't have a spare underwear either.
Off to the Oceanfront I walk, but now it was just a matter of finding A. I've been trying to call him for half an hour (probably less) but he's not picking up. If he doesn't call back at this time, I'm just gonna call it a day and go home. I stayed around though, since I didn't wanna waste all that driving and it be in vain. I went down to the area where A said he will be and I was just looking at the people ou in the sun, trying to pick A out. Saw this one guy got out of the water and heading back to the shore. I had a feeling it was A, but really can't be too sure either. Niice, he's cute hahaha The guy went to his spot and sat down. I actually came up to him and uttered Ummm, Are you? Nevermind and walked away. I got nervous since it felt like I was trying to pick the guy up and I wasn't even sure it was him so I went by the lifeguard station and stood there glancing at the guy I briefly talked to. I saw him messing with his cellphone, and seconds later my phone rang. I looked over and the guy had a grin on his face. I knew it was him. I'm just good like that [kiddin!]. I had a great time, well WE did, just letting the waves carry us, swimming, and splashing each other with water. He's really funny so I was laughing most of the time we hang out. Find it funny though, how at first he commented how I didn't look like I did in the picture. He said I looked more buff from the pic which was taken three years ago, which I'll post one of these days. These are things I don't recognize, I've stayed around the same weight for the past three/four years and didn't see much difference really. It's odd, friends and family will say You're skinny, gain some weight. Then, You're fat, go running and do exercise. After A said that, You think so? was all I could utter. I'm fine with my built really, though I got a bit self-conscious after he said that.
After that weird comment, we just went about swimming in the ocean again. A was really friendly, I'd look and he'd be talking to people from all ages, kids, couples, teenagers, grandparents which I thought was sweet. He kinda grew on me, and he was someone I felt I could be friends with, if nothing else. He kept calling me sexy which is a surefire way to make me blush. So there I was, tanned and blushing walking along the shore with A. It was nice, we walked down a good half a mile I'd say just asking each other questions, and talking about random things. He mentioned how my pic doesn't do me justice. All I could say was thanks but I still felt like a fatty hahaha after he said so at the beginning. Ju on beach!! He had to go meet his friend later on the day so we went our separate ways. He said, Give me a hug which I obligingly did, in spite of all the people at the boardwalk. Told him I had a great time which I really did. Spoke to him a little bit after that since he called to let him know he got a parking ticket. His meter ran out and those Va Beach Cops sure do their jobs. Then he called since he didn't know how to get to Olive Garden so looked it up for him. I swear he uttered, That's really sweet like ten times during our two-hour meeting. I probably am, without realizing, but I cringe when people call it out haha I just do what comes natural and I've never been sure as what the line is between doing regular things and being sweet about doing 'em. After I gave him the directions, he had to hang up so that he can concentrate on the road. He said that the traffic's backed up, so on my way home, I stopped by Chic Fil A and grabbed a sandwich. Oh my god! Chic Fil A is sooo good. That was my first time ever having their sandwich and the potato thingies yum yum yum.. Dip it in a mixed ketchup and mayonnaise
sauce, mmm it's sooo good. I was grinning ear to ear driving as I was eating since it was damn good.
I didn't bring my cell with me since it really wasn't gonna take long. It was at that brief period that he called and with me not picking up, assumed that I was angry or something. I'm not avoiding you, I just have to find my way around that's why I had to go. I understood completely about him having to end the convo, but I didn't think of it as him avoiding me. Really haven't spoken to him since then, so will probably call him sometime this week and see if he's paid his ticket yet, or just say hey. He lives three hours away, though he mentioned he's considering moving to the area :D He's thought about this before we met so yeahh..And I might be moving some place else come December anyways.....I'm a bit nervous about calling, Gahh he might think I like him too much.. If I don't call though...guess we'll never know
Ohh..Dad and 'Mom' is coming tomorrow too *Shuxxxx I thought it wouldn't be until midweek at least but will tell more later on. Time conflict and what not.. Got to see a girl I went to tech school with back in '02, eventhough she left VA just this past weekend. Spoke with a friend I haven't talked to for about eight months Gooood times Good times Oh, and Daniel resurfaced too (-_-)
Gotta get some sleep now.
Friday, August 4, 2006
Snake Pit
Gosh, I came across this and it brought me back four years ago to Basic training. I tried with all my might not to get pulled into this 'Snake Pit' as we called it. This is where the instructors try to fuck with your head lol, I laugh about it now but gosh, the horror of just being there.
I remember shaking the whole time I was having meals, legs closed together, face down to your plate, not even a word to the guys in the table you eat in.
I remember shaking the whole time I was having meals, legs closed together, face down to your plate, not even a word to the guys in the table you eat in.
Thursday, August 3, 2006
Not so new New York
I actually turned 23 this past 27th instead of 22 like I miscalculated hehe. I can't believe it's been a week now but it has been. It was nice. Definitely a complete turn around from my birthday last year which sucked, no other way to put it. But then when I took a walk and got to think about it, that the was the first time that I didn't have a family around EVER, not even a single one of them. So much has changed in one year, new home, new job (sort of), new environment, everything just completely different. As you can tell, I do reminisce quite a lot. I like that word, reminisce, I oughta be the reminisce man ala da Vinci the renaissance man, except all I do is think and not actually make or produce things.
I spent my birthday sleeping since I had to work that evening before I get to have my 3 days off. There's this policy where we couldn't be off for more than 72 hrs so didn't get my free pass yet. I got off work at 0300 Friday morning, but didn't leave my house 'til about 0600 to make my drive to New York. Figured I'd take a little trip instead of just buying something such as a computer like I was considering. I guess I don't wanna look back later and when I think of what I did for my 23rd, all I can say I did was I bought a computer and played with it all day. Great! Experiences are nicer since you always (well most of the time), you can try to relive that moment, and remember the way you felt, the joy of being alive, or being surrounded by people you love or care about (both old, or new in some cases). So yea, made the 6-hour drive to VA, dozing off for a sec on the road (not a good thing), but made it there fine. Excited, and nervous since I'm gonna have to figure out how the subway system worked. Arrived in New York 90 mins later after parking back in Jersey and catching the train. I have this thing where I think everything will work out as planned, but it's not often the case. I got to the Hamilton Station, where I intended to park and ride, and come to find out that ALL the parking spots were taken. Hmm, right on a working day, smart move Dee. So I had to drive around, and parking by a restaurant and asking a man how to get to the Trenton station. Finally made my way to Trenton, parked, paid for two nights of parking, and hopped on the Northeast Corridor Line. Naks, I feel like a veteran hehe. Well not after going to the wrong line, and having to cross the street to get to where I needed to go. Thank goodness for angels dressed in the form of humans.
One of them took shape in a blogger named Jon. I do not know what I would have done without his expertise in just about anything New York. Gaaaahhh! was all I could think of when I imagined getting around the subway, but he walked me through it and made sure I got on the right line. I looked a bit touristy trying to figure out how to get a ticket that I ended up chitchatting with a lady, telling me how the system worked, directions to where I was going, etc etc That was before she asked me if I'm mixed Filipino. I was a bit stunned that she guessed, so I asked if it was because of the way I talked. She said no, It just looked like you're mixed with it Don't you realize? I said Not really and just smiled, batting my eyes at her.
I reserved a bed at a hostel so made my way there, after trying to figure out where it was located. I walked one block down, then went back the other direction after I realized how the system works. If the street number goes up, go the other way if you need to get to a lower street number. The info was a bit misleading since it said they're just a block away from the subway, but in actuality it was more like 3 blocks down, 2 to the left. It was alright, if you just need somewhere to sleep in, it's not too bad for the price. I thought I was gonna have the room all to myself, since it was all just me when I got up there. Took off my pants and laid down since my eyes just wanted to close since I've been up for 24 hrs by the time I arrived. Fighting it off though since I'll spoil my trip if I end up sleeping during the day. I was laying down, when I heard someone trying to enter the room. Door unlocked, two guys walked in that's gonna be staying in the same room which is set up for six people. Kinda weird, trying to put on shorts, and shaking hands and introducing yourself to the newcomers. Didn't talk to them much after that since my brain wasn't functioning right until after I ended up napping. Forced myself to get up, and wandered around Union Square for a bit, trying to find Yoshinoya which I come to find out was 28 blocks from where I was. I got to witness a group performing Capoeira as well, which I found really intriguing. Just listening to the beat made me wanna up and move up there, the vibe was just really great. All the audience just encircling them, clapping along to the beat of the drums. Funny thing I found too, was I looking around and some of the faces looked familiar. I can't explain how and where but it felt like I've seen a bunch of them before. I think I stood there close to an hour just watching the performance and had this good feeling inside, just being there at the moment and experiencing something new.
Well, come Saturday I met up with Jon around noon at Union Square. I was there the previous night, just to be sure I'd know where I needed to be and not be late. We did a bit of walking, wait I take that back, it was a LOT of walking but it was nice. We went to different neighborhoods, and he explained what makes one different from another. Downtown, SoHo, Chinatown, The Village, etc. I was really giddy and in awe just listening to him. The man sure loves his city. We went to a ramen place for lunch (eventhough it was hot) and they actually have Calpis. Umm, Calpico is what it's called outside Japan. I used to get looks when I told my coworkers what I was drinking. Here's a picture, but don't let the name fool ya. It doesn't taste like pis (not that I'd know) but it is goooood. I can send ya one if you wanna try hehe We also stopped by to the business district, and that was a nice touch that between all the high-rising buildings is the St Patrick's Cathedral. I've never gone to a cathedral before, so I was just in awe once again. (Yea, I get amazed easily) I just felt at ease just walking inside it. After a stop at H&M which was our main reason heading midtown, I didn't buy anything though since there's too much stuff that I got overwhelmed. My indecisiveness kicks in and I never know what to get.
We then went back to The Village and had a meal at a yakitori (barbecue) restaurant Yakitori Taisho. It is sooo good, and walking in, you'll be transported to Japan. That's what it really felt like, took me right back to the streets of Japan. It just had a nice atmosphere to it. I about cried but I didn't since I'm out in public. We had yakitori obviously, okonomiyaki (japanese pizza) and had Asahi cold beer (which I never had until that evening). Goood times, good times. On our way to meet Jon's blogger friends, we stopped by the Japanese grocery so I can pick up some Calpis. I got two bottles of the concentrated ones. I only had a messenger bag so that's where I put them in, though a backpack probably would have felt lighter carrying them around.
We then met up with his blogger friends, Freddie and Just a Girl, with her friend Naz. I normally would not have gone, but I'm trying to come out of the shell more. I'm cool with meeting new people, but if it's meeting their friends, bf's/gf's or whatever, I freak out. Oh my god, they might not like me. Gosh, I'm gonna bore these people is what comes to mind. But I fought it, and ended up having a good time. Jon didn't go to the Roxy with us, since he was tired, and I got close to just going back to the hostel and getting some rest for the next day. But figured, what the heck, I can sleep when I get back to VA which I sure did. Twelve hours straight. It was fun. Just dancing along, having a few drinks but I think I came to the realization I might not be a big fan of clubs after all. Sure, I do like to dance but I prefer just 'avin a drink or two with friends, just talking about what random things that come to mind. Just a girl suuure can dance, and both her and Naz is pretty. There were gay? boys chatting 'em up and everything which I found quite funny.
Come 0330, we made our way back to own's haven to get rested for Sunday. They had flights to catch, whilst I had to drive home. I had a good time overall, and the trip is sure worth it.
Yours with a happy face
I spent my birthday sleeping since I had to work that evening before I get to have my 3 days off. There's this policy where we couldn't be off for more than 72 hrs so didn't get my free pass yet. I got off work at 0300 Friday morning, but didn't leave my house 'til about 0600 to make my drive to New York. Figured I'd take a little trip instead of just buying something such as a computer like I was considering. I guess I don't wanna look back later and when I think of what I did for my 23rd, all I can say I did was I bought a computer and played with it all day. Great! Experiences are nicer since you always (well most of the time), you can try to relive that moment, and remember the way you felt, the joy of being alive, or being surrounded by people you love or care about (both old, or new in some cases). So yea, made the 6-hour drive to VA, dozing off for a sec on the road (not a good thing), but made it there fine. Excited, and nervous since I'm gonna have to figure out how the subway system worked. Arrived in New York 90 mins later after parking back in Jersey and catching the train. I have this thing where I think everything will work out as planned, but it's not often the case. I got to the Hamilton Station, where I intended to park and ride, and come to find out that ALL the parking spots were taken. Hmm, right on a working day, smart move Dee. So I had to drive around, and parking by a restaurant and asking a man how to get to the Trenton station. Finally made my way to Trenton, parked, paid for two nights of parking, and hopped on the Northeast Corridor Line. Naks, I feel like a veteran hehe. Well not after going to the wrong line, and having to cross the street to get to where I needed to go. Thank goodness for angels dressed in the form of humans.
One of them took shape in a blogger named Jon. I do not know what I would have done without his expertise in just about anything New York. Gaaaahhh! was all I could think of when I imagined getting around the subway, but he walked me through it and made sure I got on the right line. I looked a bit touristy trying to figure out how to get a ticket that I ended up chitchatting with a lady, telling me how the system worked, directions to where I was going, etc etc That was before she asked me if I'm mixed Filipino. I was a bit stunned that she guessed, so I asked if it was because of the way I talked. She said no, It just looked like you're mixed with it Don't you realize? I said Not really and just smiled, batting my eyes at her.
I reserved a bed at a hostel so made my way there, after trying to figure out where it was located. I walked one block down, then went back the other direction after I realized how the system works. If the street number goes up, go the other way if you need to get to a lower street number. The info was a bit misleading since it said they're just a block away from the subway, but in actuality it was more like 3 blocks down, 2 to the left. It was alright, if you just need somewhere to sleep in, it's not too bad for the price. I thought I was gonna have the room all to myself, since it was all just me when I got up there. Took off my pants and laid down since my eyes just wanted to close since I've been up for 24 hrs by the time I arrived. Fighting it off though since I'll spoil my trip if I end up sleeping during the day. I was laying down, when I heard someone trying to enter the room. Door unlocked, two guys walked in that's gonna be staying in the same room which is set up for six people. Kinda weird, trying to put on shorts, and shaking hands and introducing yourself to the newcomers. Didn't talk to them much after that since my brain wasn't functioning right until after I ended up napping. Forced myself to get up, and wandered around Union Square for a bit, trying to find Yoshinoya which I come to find out was 28 blocks from where I was. I got to witness a group performing Capoeira as well, which I found really intriguing. Just listening to the beat made me wanna up and move up there, the vibe was just really great. All the audience just encircling them, clapping along to the beat of the drums. Funny thing I found too, was I looking around and some of the faces looked familiar. I can't explain how and where but it felt like I've seen a bunch of them before. I think I stood there close to an hour just watching the performance and had this good feeling inside, just being there at the moment and experiencing something new.
Well, come Saturday I met up with Jon around noon at Union Square. I was there the previous night, just to be sure I'd know where I needed to be and not be late. We did a bit of walking, wait I take that back, it was a LOT of walking but it was nice. We went to different neighborhoods, and he explained what makes one different from another. Downtown, SoHo, Chinatown, The Village, etc. I was really giddy and in awe just listening to him. The man sure loves his city. We went to a ramen place for lunch (eventhough it was hot) and they actually have Calpis. Umm, Calpico is what it's called outside Japan. I used to get looks when I told my coworkers what I was drinking. Here's a picture, but don't let the name fool ya. It doesn't taste like pis (not that I'd know) but it is goooood. I can send ya one if you wanna try hehe We also stopped by to the business district, and that was a nice touch that between all the high-rising buildings is the St Patrick's Cathedral. I've never gone to a cathedral before, so I was just in awe once again. (Yea, I get amazed easily) I just felt at ease just walking inside it. After a stop at H&M which was our main reason heading midtown, I didn't buy anything though since there's too much stuff that I got overwhelmed. My indecisiveness kicks in and I never know what to get.
We then went back to The Village and had a meal at a yakitori (barbecue) restaurant Yakitori Taisho. It is sooo good, and walking in, you'll be transported to Japan. That's what it really felt like, took me right back to the streets of Japan. It just had a nice atmosphere to it. I about cried but I didn't since I'm out in public. We had yakitori obviously, okonomiyaki (japanese pizza) and had Asahi cold beer (which I never had until that evening). Goood times, good times. On our way to meet Jon's blogger friends, we stopped by the Japanese grocery so I can pick up some Calpis. I got two bottles of the concentrated ones. I only had a messenger bag so that's where I put them in, though a backpack probably would have felt lighter carrying them around.
We then met up with his blogger friends, Freddie and Just a Girl, with her friend Naz. I normally would not have gone, but I'm trying to come out of the shell more. I'm cool with meeting new people, but if it's meeting their friends, bf's/gf's or whatever, I freak out. Oh my god, they might not like me. Gosh, I'm gonna bore these people is what comes to mind. But I fought it, and ended up having a good time. Jon didn't go to the Roxy with us, since he was tired, and I got close to just going back to the hostel and getting some rest for the next day. But figured, what the heck, I can sleep when I get back to VA which I sure did. Twelve hours straight. It was fun. Just dancing along, having a few drinks but I think I came to the realization I might not be a big fan of clubs after all. Sure, I do like to dance but I prefer just 'avin a drink or two with friends, just talking about what random things that come to mind. Just a girl suuure can dance, and both her and Naz is pretty. There were gay? boys chatting 'em up and everything which I found quite funny.
Come 0330, we made our way back to own's haven to get rested for Sunday. They had flights to catch, whilst I had to drive home. I had a good time overall, and the trip is sure worth it.
Yours with a happy face
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