London town II

Daniel and I eventually settled on a tube station to meet, after looking up the stops on the site and much texting back and forth. Being in the library has calmed me down a little. I really was trying to push off of the bad feeling considering I'm in bleeping London.

Debating where to go since we really didn't want to waste the day. Ended up settling with Cambridge since London was just a bit painful to go to after the cancelled meet. Cambridge was about a 60-mins or so drive from the town that we're at. So we got there, and went to Nando's which is a Portuguese restaurant. Food was real good, though I only had spiced chicken and rice along with a free drink for first-timers at Nando's. So just walked around Cambridge pretty much and stopped by the mall for a little while. Browsing through the music store, and ended up buying a book which I've kinda been meaning to get for quite sometime. A behind the scenes look on the business side of how the Spice Girls reinvented pop back in the 90's. Did I mention I was a fan? So yeah, ended up buying it at 60 % off. It got me thinking though, about the whole things happen for a reason that people say. I dunno, if the meet/date or whatever was to be cancelled just so I'd be able to find this book hmmm.. That's a bit lame lol since I could have ordered the book online. So ended up just going back to the house, and reading the whole night. Yep, waay to spend a night in England eh.

Thursday - The day finally rolled around though it wasn't a good feeling I had when I woke up. Not getting to see Daniel yesterday really got me frustrated and got me questioning about the whole trip. Laying in bed thinking if I should even bother going through with the whole meeting up thing. I even considered of just packing my stuff up and heading to a hostel around London until I fly out of the country. It is good getting to see my friend Jim, but it just didn't seem like it was enough. I just wanted to leave everything behind and be in company of strangers since the whole cancelling thing really pissed me off, if it hasn't been obvious.

Looking back I can't pinpoint what helped to kinda change my mood for the day since all I remember now was showering, then us driving to base to get gas and grab something to eat. So we left the base and headed out to the station so I can catch the tube, along with our lunch. During this drive was the only time I got nervous about meeting up with Daniel, mixed with excitement that FINALLY, we'll get to meet, a day after the planned date (the time to meet, not the other thing called 'date'. It's not really a date now, is it?) So we finally arrived at Redbridge where I'm gonna have to catch a ride to Shadwell station which is 2 zones away from each other.

The meet up time was at 4 pm but I didn't get to catch one until around 3:30 pm. So was just thinking, heh, I should be able to make it on time. Well 4 pm rolls around and am still on the Central line just approaching Bank station. And from there, would have to switch to Docklands Light Railway (DLR) to get to Shadwell. Well with two suitcases, weighing about 20 kilos each, it was a bit of a struggle having to walk up and down the stairs to get to the other line I had to catch. Finally got to Shadwell, feeling not so fresh after all these damn walking, around 4:15 . Got off the railway, and was gonna start descending down a flight of stairs, until one girl mentioned that I can just use the elevator. Wheeew! (It was actually the girl that I smiled at during the ride, so note * smiling really does make a difference)

Finally got on the first floor after the descent which seemed to take foreverrrrr. So hopped out of the elevator, and looked around the station, trying to find Daniel or someone that resembled him and nada. He was nowhere to be found. I dunno, felt a little annoyance that he could not have hang around a little longer, if he actually did come. 30 ft away from the stairs was a payphone, so went and called Jim letting him know that I got to Shadwell just fine, with no Daniel in sight. Asked him to text Daniel and mention that I'm at the train station waiting. I tried calling Daniel but only got his voicemail so just left a message on it as well. After two phone calls, I still had credit left on the payphone but I really can't get my change back. Good thing that some girl was standing, waiting to use it so I told her that she can just go ahead since I still had some credit left. She had a look on her face like if I was kidding or something. I dunno, it seems like these days, people don't expect any good thing done to them that if you act kind or corteous, they're just in shock that someone was nice to them. That made me feel good inside so I stepped aside by my luggage and was sweating and looking around trying to find a familiar face. And right when I looked at the stairs, a guy in a brown leather jacket, waved at me smiling, and all the anger from the day before just went away and all I can think of was how glad I was that I came.

London town

I would not have imagined that I'd be making a last minute trip to London out of all places. It's still one of the places I've considered going but with no rush. If this would have been (I'll admit) in the Spice Girls' heydays, I would have hopped on a plane in a record to have seen them hehe. So moving along.. I booked a 7-day trip for London to see Daniel though it wasn't 'til mid-week that I got to meet him.

So the flight to Seattle from Japan ended up being delayed for about four hours which I really didn't mind. Considering my original arrival time in Seattle would have been around 9 am , then leaving for London eight hours later at 6 pm. So that kinda did me good. Setting it back a few hours, less time to kill. Feel bad for the other passengers though, who had to take connection flights with little time in between but yeah, they would have made it sooner or later. It was funny just watching some people get real pissed about the delay. I probably would have been too if I would have missed my flight, but am not, so I can take the delay in stride. I just chuckled listening to what they were saying. Oh yeah this is about London huh..

So arrived in London on a Sunday, around 1130 with my friend Jim instead that's going to be picking me up. I was all smiling with the plane finally landing at Heathrow Airport. The flight was interesting enough since I sat next to a couple who lived and worked at the same base that I just came out of. Me and the man were talking for a bit. 'Twas funny considering I was dreading having to sit next to them since they seemed stuck up a little when I just got on. Ended up waiting for about an hour before Jim finally made it. I was getting pissed, but just kept telling myself that "Hey, you're in England now. A bit of a wait won't kill ya." And I guess the prospect of just getting to see Daniel later on was enough to keep me calm. Jim finally arrived so it was all good. It was nice getting to hang with him in person after about a year of waiting. With him moving and everything, we've mostly kept in touch through e-mails or phone calls which I usually initiated. I'll do admit I like talking on the phone though it has wreaked havoc on my wallet from time to time. But I just really didn't mind I guess, money's nothing compared to the happiness I feel whenever I talk to my loved ones whether it be family or even just friends.

So boarded on a bus that'll take us to the tube station bound for wherever Jim lives at. We made a stop midway though since we got hungry. The excitement's in full gear too considering I didn't mind having to lag around two suitcase around the train station and up the stairs to get to the street. We made a stop at Piccadilly Circus and grabbed a bite at Pizza Hut and talked for a little while. Really didn't do much for the day since we still had to go back to his house to get settled. The tube ride to where we needed to make the stop wasn't really that far. What I didn't know was that he had to drive like 90 mins to get to that said train station called Redbridge. There I was bitching to him about having to wait for an hour at the airport lol.. So ended up thanking him gladly for going through all those travelling just to pick me up.

Monday - headed out to Central London to do a little sightseeing. Got to get on a computer and ended up talking to the family for a little bit. None of the family really knew that I was making this trip and they were all expecting my phone call the previous day. I got to talk to my uncle who told me that my Aunt was there next to him, crying so ended up making a call just to actually tell her that I'm fine. My family's spread out so will just leave their whereabouts since it can be a tad confusing to others. We came by SoHo which was where the bars and clubs we're at but didn't stay since Jim got uncomfortable after some guy winked at him while we were walking.

Tuesday - the same thing pretty much. Got to see the Buckingham Palace, and had dinner at Planet Hollywood which Jim picked. Talk about acting touristy. I just went along, and it ended up alright with a cute spanish waiter and all

Wednesday - woke up all excited since this was the big day, the day that I will get to meet Daniel. Well it was good seeing Jim, but that wasn't really why I flew to London lol. So there I was, got showered and everything all smiles, thinking Yes, this is the day, this is the day. Well we had to go to base first since Jim needed to run some errands. Figured I'd text Daniel just to say hi, letting him know that I'm at Jim's as we've talked about previously to offset the cost of having to spend money on a hotel. And there was his reply back, asking how he can reach me since he needed to speak with me. Oh oh, that's not a good sign I thought and it just kinda made my excitement go away.

So dialled his number and spoke with him. Well I really didn't understand him too much on the phone except that he missed the flight for Italy that Saturday so ended up going to Oxford or some shit like that and that he got into an argument with his flatmates. I tried listening as he explained it to me some more but I think I was just real annoyed I sorta tuned out what he was saying. I really tried to be understanding coz that must have been real stressful to him as well, not getting to fly home and back, then end up having a fight with your housemates. All I can say was ok, guess we can just meet tomorrow then. Though on the inside, my mind just went through with all these thoughts and ideas. This isn't going well. Doesn't he care that I flew all the way to see him, with little rest in between, just delaying our meeting just like that. Why did I even bother with this guy.. Does he even care I came?

After the phone conversation, still had to text with him to figure out a good station for him to pick me up. So with this rage brimming inside, I had to keep calm and avoid making a snide remark even on the phone about what an idiot he is.

It's been close to three weeks since I left Japan and everything's been going good really. Crazy considering I've been all over the past few weeks and got to meet interesting people, and seen different places.

London trip turned out to be great. Just what I needed in transitioning to a new life you can say. I can't imagine what things would have been like if I didn't go there. At least, I've made some memories which can make me smile at least, like now during the holidays where my cousin had to work and I stayed home. Thanks to a blogger friend Rey who gave me his itinerary about London. I didn't get to go to all the places he did, but it was still helpful. Though gotta admit, it wasn't really the town that prompted me to visit but a certain somebody. Maybe I oughta write about those seven days so I wouldn't forget though I REALLY doubt I would. To be that happy just to be with somebody, standing there just smiling as you watch them go about in the kitchen to make a meal. Wowww, so that's a glimpse of what it's like to be in love. I sure am looking forward to it :D

Am settled here in Colorado after doing a stint in Vegas, LA, and Phoenix on the way back. Me and my cousin went on a little road trip that spanned three states in five days. I was just in awe as we were nearing Las Vegas just seeing the glowing city from the distance. I wonder if I'm a moth considering bright lights really does it for me. We ended up sleeping through the first night since we were just beat having just driven around 14 hrs that day. Ended up taking the long route making our way down to New Mexico, then Arizona, then back up to LV to circumvent having to drive through Utah. Well I woke up around 4 since I was hungry so decided to step out a little to hunt for food. I eventually settled for Denny's since that was the only place I could eat in at that time of day anywho. Mann, that was just awesome getting to sit down and order off of an English menu. I was just beaming as I ask for a breakfast meal of pancakes, sausage, sunnyside up eggs and a warm glass of hot chocolate, complete with whipped cream on top. Yummm. After the meal, ended up just walking to the hotel and falling back asleep. Woke up few hours later, then headed out to the mall. Malls are about the same so nothing much to say.

That night, we tried finding some gay clubs but had no luck. I was about near to tears just seeing my cousin get frustrated having to drive back and forth in the strip. I was the 'navigator' but the area map we got wasn't really helping but still, I felt like it was my fault for some reason. I just wished for the trip to end, thinking why'd we even bother with this getaway in the first place. So that, we ended up parking at the hotel and I just wanted to call it a night but Haunani (the cousin) thought otherwise. So we headed out to Caesar's Palace, and got to go in to the Pussycat Lounge and see the Pussycat Dolls perform. They had a different batch performing at the club but it was still a good watch. It's the cousin anywho who has a crush on the Dolls, so that was the motivation right there. It really didn't do much to me, maybe just a bit, as I kinda developed a crush to dark-haired Laura.

Merry Christmas

The surroundings have changed but it's still the same.

Merry Christmas from a hitori de Colorado.

Little adventures I

It's been close to three weeks since I left Japan and everything's been going good really. Crazy considering I've been all over the past few weeks and got to meet interesting people, and seen different places.

London trip turned out to be great. Just what I needed in transitioning to a new life you can say. I can't imagine what things would have been like if I didn't go there. At least, I've made some memories which can make me smile at least, like now during the holidays where my cousin had to work and I stayed home. Thanks to a blogger friend Rey who gave me his itinerary about London. I didn't get to go to all the places he did, but it was still helpful. Though gotta admit, it wasn't really the town that prompted me to visit but a certain somebody. Maybe I oughta write about those seven days so I wouldn't forget though I REALLY doubt I would. To be that happy just to be with somebody, standing there just smiling as you watch them go about in the kitchen to make a meal. Wowww, so that's a glimpse of what it's like to be in love. I sure am looking forward to it :D

Am settled here in Colorado after doing a stint in Vegas, LA, and Phoenix on the way back. Me and my cousin went on a little road trip that spanned three states in five days. I was just in awe as we were nearing Las Vegas just seeing the glowing city from the distance. I wonder if I'm a moth considering bright lights really does it for me. We ended up sleeping through the first night since we were just beat having just driven around 14 hrs that day. Ended up taking the long route making our way down to New Mexico, then Arizona, then back up to LV to circumvent having to drive through Utah. Well I woke up around 4 since I was hungry so decided to step out a little to hunt for food. I eventually settled for Denny's since that was the only place I could eat in at that time of day anywho. Mann, that was just awesome getting to sit down and order off of an English menu. I was just beaming as I ask for a breakfast meal of pancakes, sausage, sunnyside up eggs and a warm glass of hot chocolate, complete with whipped cream on top. Yummm. After the meal, ended up just walking to the hotel and falling back asleep. Woke up few hours later, then headed out to the mall. Malls are about the same everywhere so nothing much to say.

That night, we tried finding some gay clubs but had no luck. I was about near to tears just seeing my cousin get frustrated having to drive back and forth in the strip. I was the 'navigator' but the area map we got wasn't really helping but still, I felt like it was my fault for some reason. I just wished for the trip to end, thinking why'd we even bother with this getaway in the first place. So that, we ended up parking at the hotel and I just wanted to call it a night but Haunani (the cousin) thought otherwise. So we headed out to Caesar's Palace, and got to go in to the Pussycat Lounge and see the Pussycat Dolls perform. They had a different batch performing at the club but it was still a good watch. It's the cousin anywho who has a crush on the Dolls, so that was the motivation right there. It really didn't do much to me, maybe just a bit, as I kinda had a crush to dark-haired Laura. That was about it. They did a few numbers and it was over around midnight. We just walked around the casino level and decided to call it a night since we gotta be sure to wake up on time for check out and drive out to Los Angeles afterwards...

What having free time makes you do

I . . .
(x) smoked a cigarette
( ) crashed a friend's car
(X) Got drunk with a good friend
( ) stolen a car
(X) been in love
(X) been dumped
(X) shoplifted
( ) been fired
(X) been in a fist fight
(x) snuck out of your parent's house

() been arrested
( ) gone on a blind date
(x) skipped school
(x) seen someone die (and he was a friend too)
( ) been to Canada
( ) been to Mexico
(x) been on a plane
( ) purposely set a part of yourself on fire
(x) eaten Sushi
( ) been skiing.. snowboarding

( ) been moshing at a concert
( ) taken painkillers
(X) love someone or miss someone right now
(X) lain on your back and watched cloud shapes go by
(X) made a snow angel
(X) flown a kite
(X) built a sand castle
(X) gone puddle jumping
(X) played dress up
(X) jumped into a pile of leaves
( ) gone sledding

(X) cheated while playing a game
(X) been lonely
(X) fallen asleep at work/school
( ) used a fake id
(X) watched the sun set
(x) felt an earthquake/tremor
( ) touched a snake (probably NEVER, they freak me out)
(x) slept beneath the stars
(x) been tickled
( ) been robbed
(x) been misunderstood

(x) pet a reindeer/goat
(x) won a contest
(x) run a red light
( ) been suspended from school
( ) been in a car crash
( ) had braces
(x) eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night
(x) had deja vu
(x) danced in the moonlight
(x) liked the way you look
(x) witnessed a crime

(X) questioned your heart
(x) been obsessed with post-it notes
(X) squished barefoot through the mud
(X) been lost
(X) been to the opposite side of the country
(X) swum in the ocean
(X) felt like dying
(X) cried yourself to sleep
( ) played cops and robbers (umm, what is this game?)
( ) recently colored with crayons
(X) sung karaoke

(X) paid for a meal with only coins
(X) done something you told yourself you wouldn't
(X) made prank phone calls
(X) laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose (threw up my lunch too)( ) caught a snowflake on your tongue
(x) danced in the rain
( ) written a letter to Santa Claus
( ) been kissed under a mistletoe
(x) watched the sun rise with someone you care about
(x) blown bubbles
(x) made a bonfire on the beach

( ) crashed a party
(x) gone roller-skating
(x) had a wish come true
( ) worn pearls
(x) jumped off a bridge
( ) ate dog/cat food
( ) told a complete stranger you loved them
(x) kissed a mirror
(X) sung in the shower
(x) had a dream that you married someone
( ) glued your hand to something

( ) got your tongue stuck to a flag pole
( ) kissed a fish
(x) sat on a roof top
(x) screamed at the top of your lungs
( ) done a one-handed cartwheel
(x) talked on the phone for more than 6 hours
(x) stayed up all night
( ) didn't take a shower for a week
( ) pick and ate an apple right off the tree
(x) climbed a tree (and had a broken arm after earth yanked me down)
(x) had a tree house
(x) are scared to watch scary movies alone

(x) believe in ghosts
( ) have more then 30 pairs of shoes
( ) worn a really ugly outfit to school just to see what others say
( ) gone streaking
(x) gone doorbell ditching
(x) played chicken
(x) jumped into a pool/hot tub/lake with all your clothes on
(x) been told you're hot by a complete stranger
(x) broken a bone
(x) been easily amused
( ) caught a fish then ate it

(x) caught a butterfly
(x) laughed so hard you cried
(x) cried so hard you laughed
(x) cheated on a test
( ) have a Britney Spears CD
(x) forgotten someone's name
(x) French braided someone's hair
( ) gone skinny dipping in a pool
( ) been threatened to be kicked out of your house
( ) been kicked out your house
(x) have had a fantasy over someone you love as a good friend
( ) sun tanned naked
( ) ran naked in the rain

As they say:
feel free to play if you like... remember, Sharing is Caring...Not sure about THAT! Is it though??

If you shoot an arrow...

The move is finally done with. Today was the 2nd day that the packers came by to take everything away for shipping. I had three days of appointment, yesterday was when they picked up my unaccompanied baggage. Those are pretty much the essentials such as kitchenware, seasonal clothing, stuff that you would need when you move to a new location. Television, dvd player, all those stayed behind but the computer :D It better be in Virginia when I get there.. if not, heh I'll live. I was a bit freaked to be honest considering this will be the first time where I PCS'ed (permanent change of station). So really wasn't sure how to go about at doing things. I ended up being awake all night Sunday, then pretty much all day Monday. My sleep's been messed up after getting off of the nightshift. I've been trying to stay awake all day, but still fell asleep in the afternoon and waking up around midnight, then repeat.

It felt weird seeing all my stuff packed away. It didn't hit me until the second day they came back to pack everything else. Most I could really do was stand around, since they do everything for you. So I stood back at the porch as I watch them work. I got teary-eyed just looking since that was the first time where it struck me that this is it, I'm finally gonnabe leaving. It felt good too, well seeing all of these things I'd been able to have over the years. I'm really thankful for the opportunity of being able to just buy something I liked or wanted. I came to Japan with only two suitcase and nothing else. Finally getting to be able to actually own things, it felt real good. It could have been something like a magazine, a pair of shoes, or even my computer, getting to finally afford them psyches me out from time to time. It really isn't much when you think about it, but it really means a lot to me. To a child who's never had the chance to actually have something he wanted, this was a giant leap. I'm real thankful to my family though, since they provided me with everything I needed. Well not my mom and dad, but my mom's side of the family who were working abroad. They pretty much helped us out from the time I was a baby, until I was 16 after which I moved to the States. It's different when things are given to you, and getting to pick something that you actually wanted. Once in a while, being a kid, you really can't help not to comment about how you'd rather have something else. And being told to just shut up, and be grateful for what you get does something to a kid. It sorta made me lose my wishing and wanting sense, that after I moved in with my dad, and him telling me to just say so if I wanted something, that was a major leap which I just didn't know how to take. It was even scary, that I just didn't know what to with this power, so to speak, that it kinda ruined my living with him and his family. I just smile about it now when I look back, but I wonder at times what it could have been like if I ended up just staying with them until I finished university and everything. Hee hee. Good ole sunny Californ-I-A.

But going back, lol, I have about 10 days left in Japan. I'm staying in the hotel at the moment (billeting, as we call it) and pretty much just doing nothing. I gotta go back to the apartment tomorrow so they can pick up the furnitures they lent me, and see the landlord later that day to get my lease terminated. Air Force is awesome, lol, giving you rent money and even letting you borrow furnitures. But really, I can't wait to get out! It's been really great, but I wanna see what the "real world" is really like. Maybe I can get on the show, hmmmmmm...

Perhaps, I'll make that Sanrio Land trip and take some pictures for this one person. Maybe that might really do it and get him to visit Japan :D Japan's a really great place to see, the clash with the ancient and the modern times is just amazing. Temples right in the heart of the city, traditional outfits in between the suits and the sub-cultures is just wowww. Maybe I can write more about it, I shouldn't promise though. It'll be better for it to just show up than me talking about doing it. Japan will always have a special place in my heart. I had most of my firsts happen here. First time to the beach (despite of living in the islands this whole time growing up) Nooo, not the Bahamas or any of the Caribbean Islands. First time I got wined and dined. Got wasted for the first time. Even get my heart broken. Broke some afterwards because of it which I'm not too proud about. Get close to getting laid, but not knowing the "signals" lol. Mann, if I could go back to that day... :D

Heh, it's been good. Friday was great too. Got to speak to my ex-boss which I rarely spoke with when I was running around to get some paper signed. Let's just say I blushed like crazy, for a good 5 minutes which seemed was taking forever! But it was great. I'll elaborate more later. At least, it was a good blush. Not the type where you get called down to an office and get asked about pictures (the type you really wouldn't want anyone to see, not naked ones either!) that you forgot that you placed on the network drive two years earlier. Talk about the past biting you in the butt.

Trip to London has been finalized so that's a trip I'm looking forward to as well. Because of time restraints with my cousin's schedule, I'm flying to London right after I land in the States. I really can't take a direct flight from London coz the mil just wouldn't let me. So will land in Seattle at 9 am, then catch a plane at 6 pm bound for London. Will be seeing my old friend Jim that lives there now, though the trip was mainly to see a guy that I met online, Niel. We spoke right on a perfect timing, with me leaving Japan and everything.

Maybe I can talk about him a bit. We briefly spoke Aug 2004, then nothing else. It wasn't until about four weeks ago, that he IM'ed me out of the blue. Didn't realize I gave him my new ID. And we got to talking for a good three hours during which I got to see him on cam, and hear him talk. He talked about meeting, though I really didn't give it much of a thought, with being in a different country and all. We've spoken a few more times after that, and he was really adamant about doing so. That if he wasn't in some language courses in London, he would have flown already to see me. So I figured, what's there to lose really. I'll get to see London at least, and visit my friend Jim so why not. Niel has offered to pay for half of my trip, though I'm debating whether to take him up on his offer. He mentioned about flying out to the States after I've been living there so will see how it all goes. I've had my friend Jim speak to him on the phone as well, and Jim said that Niel was a really nice guy. They might go meet up over the weekend, after much persuasion with telling Jim to do so. He's freaking out that Niel might hit on him. Sheeeshh, typical straight man. Hahaha

Well it's close to 5 am so will probably just go back up to my room and watch a movie perhaps. I have 48 hrs to knock out: Kiki's Delivery Service, A Castle in the Sky, Constantine, and Happy Endings. All of the shoppette's DVD has disappeared somehow. They had a great collection before they were renovated, I think they might have sold almost all of it, but they barely had any stuff to choose from when I came tonight. Didn't want to leave empty-handed so will see how the viewing goes.

Saw the documentary "Paris Is Burning" and it was a good watch. It was pretty much about "Vogue" which was popularized by Madonna in the early 90's, from what I've read somewhere. I can vaguely recall her music video for it, but it was nice to see where it all started. The topic didn't really interest me too much before I got it, it was simply these lines that prompted me to check it out:

"Everybody wants to leave something behind them, some impression, some mark upon the world. And then you think, you've left a mark on the world if you just get through it and a few people remember your name. Then you've left a mark. You don't have to bend the world. I think it's better just to enjoy it. Pay your dues and enjoy it. If you shoot an arrow and it goes real high, hooray for you."

Said Hey! What's going on...

Wowww, it's been almost two weeks since I last wrote something.. Talk about discipline! Working the 12-hr shifts really made the time go by, it seems. One more week and I'm off! Suweeeeet. Hmm, can't really remember much what happened the past 14 days. But pretty much, waking up, watch a tv show or something, work 12 hrs, go home, sleep, repeat.

I've pretty much just been doing some outprocessing any chance I get. Pretty much means I have a checklist that I'm gonna need to get completed, or can't leave this base. Got everything set up as for dates that my stuff are gonna get packed and picked up, personal items, household goods, and the furniture they let me borrow during my stay. I've gotten a fly out date though I might shift my vacation a bit and stop by London right after landing in the states. The said person who resurfaced two weeks ago has asked me to stop by London, and I'm actually considering it, crazy as that might be. I've only spoken to him twice since then, and yet he's real adamant about getting to meet up. Umm, I guess I can say I fancy him a bit *blushes*
It's real silly when I think about it really, but he has his way of words as for getting me to visit. Name is Daniel and he's Italian going to some sort of aircraft school in London at the moment.
I've got a good friend that lives there now anywho, so I will go visit him as well. Haven't seen him close to a year, but pretty much talked to him through email or on the phone, daily. I get bored at work, and so does he so it works out both ways. I'm still giving it some thought considering I could only stay there for less than a week since I'm gonna spend some time with my cousin who I haven't seen in two years.
We're both doing time...errrr.. serving with the military ehe. Last time I saw her was here in Japan when she visited Jun 03 which ended up becoming a 90-day vacation.
Really looking forward to seeing her, and getting to do stuff with her. Go clubbing, go on a long drives with, or just having her near and just talking about things. Drive down all the way to Cali which should be a blast. LA, maybe even San Diego if it's not too far. I've heard it's pretty nice out.

So yeah, that's about what's been going on really. Perhaps tomorrow, I'll write about Kyoto while the trip is still fresh in my mind.

I dunno what to do

Ten hours out of the shift and I pretty much is running out of things to do. I'm working back at the helpdesk though am not sure if working nights is really a good idea. I pretty much sit here and not do a whole lot since we barely get phone calls during the shift. It drags from time to time, like tonight and I really don't know what to do. I'm getting bored of reading stuff, as much as I enjoy reading, I just have no idea what to surf about.

Pretty much emailing back and forth with my friend through out the night so that made the shift a bit more fun. He left 10 months ago and we pretty much just been doing that this whole time, I dunno coz it must be real hard for him being all the way there and his fiancee here in Japan. Or perhaps, I just like the feeling that I'm needed. Nah, it works both ways. He enjoys "talking" back and forth as much as I do, and he's pretty much the only one I can talk to about things that bother me, especially with the family. It's usually the family that you turn to for any problems that you have, but if it's them that you are having troubles dealing with, who do you turn to really?

So that, we kinda got to talking about what I'm gonna be when I'm on leave (or vacation) I was considering going to London now, even for just about 2 weeks over the holidays. The ticket cost is pretty much cheap anywho, for about $600, I can fly to the UK from Colorado, and that is for a round trip ticket. At first, I was gonna do a hop in a few states but then again, why rush considering I'm moving to Virginia this January. Saw this one girl's blog and I got all excited since she was doing a road trip all over the states. I've always wanted to try that but with some things beyond my control back then, age, money, amongst others, I didn't get to do so. And now, i'm close to getting to do those things and yet it feels so far away.

I got to talking to my coworker about living in Japan and everything. We sorta focused on the loneliness that is hard to avoid when you're amongst the locals. How you go off base and out to the city to help brush off the loneliness that one feels from time to time. And yet, it just worsens since you just feel so out of place with all these people surrounding you, and yet not even one you can talk to or relate to. It's probably not the case but with the difference in appearance and the language barrier, it just makes it even harder. With me living off base, I've been getting that feeling more often since I really can't just step out down the hall and knock on a friend's door. Most people I've spoken would give their front teeth just to get to move to an apartment, and yet there I was thinking "it's not really that great." Maybe it's just me....

It feels like I just want the next five weeks to breeze by and finally get out of this place. Yet at the same time, as my departure would near, everything here will just seem too precious. From going to the "bento" to get a meal to have, to the convenience store to pay the bills. I could go on and on, but isn't that the case though? Things only seem precious when they are close to an end, whether it be a time spent with someone, moving to a different place, or getting a different job.

Isn't it crazy how people resurface back into your life? People you haven't spoken with for almost a year, and ooopsiee, there they are like nothing even happened. It's like WTF? and yet you really don't question them, as much as you'd want. You just go on talking like there wasn't even that gap in between. Happened with two people this past two days. I'm real glad though :D I've had more and more online friends than I ever did and I'm thankful for that. Well not always lol. I get jaded on some days and think what's the point of even having online friends. These are people you wouldn't even meet in a lifetime and yet you waste all these time on them. Yet, my heart always knows better. It makes me remember that behind that piece of metal are actual human beings just like me, who are "wasting their time" as much as I was. Ahh, the little prince story comes into play. Per the fox's words though it would have to be adjusted a little "It is the time you have wasted for your rose that makes your rose so important."

Looking back

Whoooo, this week sure flew by. Could have updated earlier but I guess laziness kicked in. Either that, or sorta lack of inactivity. I'm doing this Friday night 1/4 into the shift.

I was off up until Sunday night last week and really didn't go anywhere to do stuff. I wanted to but it was taking forever to decide where to go so ended up just staying in both days. Helped out a little for the set up for the Asian bazaar (an even where there's a hangar full of stuff you can buy; furnitures, decors, swords, even some traditional Japanese outfit). I ended up just working for an hour since it got me tired hauling the trash out back and forth for like 20 times. I was gonna help out Saturday but decided against it since it was my day off.

Hmm, Saturday I went by the bazaar and ended up picking up some things. I sure did came back for this one lamp that I eyed when I was helping out Friday and somehow was debating whether to buy it or not, but still bought it though. Seems like I have a thing for lamps lol. I dunno, as much as I don't like bulbs, I don't mind them too much on lamps. I just love that cozy atmosphere it gives out whether it be in the bedroom or the living room. Maybe I can take a pic of it later on. I also got some mink blankets for me and my mom. Well i liked the one that's got the wolves in it in the forest and for her, pretty much a tiger that takes up the whole thing. She asked me if I can get her one a while ago and I was like NO! Hehe, I'm sure she'd be happy when she gets it on the mail. Will try to have it out before I leave Japan, so it'll be a bit cheaper instead of sending it from the states. Also got a stepkansu (the pic) to give to the family probably. Unless I take interest after seeing it out on display lol. It is nice though, so if I changed my mind I can just keep it to meself ha!

Hmm tried staying up late Saturday night so I can sleep in during Sunday, and get ready for night shift. It dragged on the first night since we're doing 12-hr shifts at the moment in what is called a Panama schedule. Pretty much, it goes: 2 on - 2 off - 3 on - 3 off. I've thought your days off changes every week but apparently you get every other weekend off which isn't bad. It was a bit long but it was nice. We don't get too many phone calls but just being out here again is a joy in itself.

So worked two more days during which I've made converts out of my coworkers once again. And nooo, it's not to Islam or anything like that! I got them to watch Arrested Development and they both liked it so mission accomplished. I oughta get paid for that or something. Neh, it's good enough I've made them into a fan of the show. Is that just normal or what? If I like something, I sorta push it on other people, but in a good way. I dunno, a way of sharing I guess. Eventhough I've seen the episodes of a show over and over, for example, I'd watch it all over again if I'm with someone who's never seen it, much less heard of it. So that's all set, we knocked out a whole season in 36 hrs working time :D

Oh yeah, I had a customer who I should keep a note of. He was trying to check his email from home, and is havening some trouble trying to get in. He was getting an error that I've never seen or heard of either lol so I did research up on it and didn't find anything sadly. It seems that it was only his end though since I can get to it just fine from work. We got to talking for a bit, so that's cool. At one time, I ended up talking with a customer for a good hour. It's nice though, since they give you advice on different things. With some, they've even mentioned their goals, and dreams those kind of stuff. And I love just that, getting an insight into somebody else's life, even in a small way. We didn't get to fix his problem, but that conversation made my night. He even emailed personally just to say thanks. The type of customer that you wouldn't mind bending over backwards.

Wednesday, can't remember what I did. :(

Thursday, I finally got my fly out date. YIPPPEEEE! I was a bit confused with what route to take lol, since I was intending to make stops in different places. But it's all set now. It feels so much better knowing a date instead of being in a limbo as to when I'm gonna be leaving. I fly out to Seattle from Japan, and then from there fly to Colorado on a flight which I have yet to get. It's weird since I fly to CO, back to WA, then fly out to VA on my departure date. Reason being is my friend is gonna try to go on leave and go home to WA so yeah, that's pretty much why I'm doing this weird itinerary. That way, I can stay in Seattle for a few days at least. Though I have no idea what to expect considering I've never been there.
I was up til about 6, and I really wish I had somebody to hang out on times like this. I just about run out of things to do, watch DVD, chat (which is getting old), or surf the net. Times that I miss living with someone from time to time. Yeah they say solitude is good yada, yada, but there's just some times where it gets a bit too much. Then when I do indeed live with someone, think Gah, i wanna be alone again. so dunno? Whatcha think? Always wanting something you haven't got.

I just wanna be close, really close to someone who will leave me alone

Week's certainly over, and it felt like it dragged despite of me working for just three days. Sorta been a crazy week coz of some issues we're trying to handle at work. With me working with computers, I'm assigned to a shop that pushes out patches, and updates to the network due to vulnerabilities and bugs that Microsoft usually has. It's funny sometimes to think that this time last year, I was in a yet familiar territory and dealing with close to the same emotions. I got moved to my current shop around this time last year, and hated, well scratch that (hate is such a strong word lol, according to an old friend), disliked working there from the beginning. It was enticing at first really, but the excitement wore off immediately. It got so bad that I felt I had no way out that I tried getting out of my extension (it's where I'd have to do an extra year here in Japan instead of the usual two year tour) which as you can tell, didn't happen. I tried to make the best of this shop, but it is just hard. You come in, check the status of how many computers got patched. If not, import the noncompliant's list to a spreadsheet and remote to each computer one by one and patch them manually. *What we use is called Systems Management Server which is a software that's used to push out software upgrades, and patches to other computers, amongst other things. It'll also let you troubleshoot other people's problems from your end, when they could be miles away from your location. SMS will actually let you take over the computer and control the mouse and the keyboard. Well with one update, there were still around 1800 machines that needed it and considerin it was due (tomorrow), it was a bit upsetting. Having to call the WGM's up and checking with them how they're doing with patching. Heh, all these acronyms you'd end up learning in the mil.

All this pretty much comes down to is I'm leaving the shop and going back to the Helpdesk (renamed to Communications Focal Point - CFP, then to Missions Operations Center - MOC) They were gonna call it Communications Operations Center but acronyms wouldn't sound too good with that, when answering the phone. I go back to it this Sunday, and that really made me glad. Dunno, I was at peace once again, knowing I'm gonna be doing something I enjoy doing. Everybody else doesn't like working there really, as people have voiced out. I'm probably one of the few, umm more like THE only one who likes working there. True, it's got its moments, but it was something that I looked forward coming to everyday. Glad that I get to work, and not Gah, I got to work again. I'm trying to put this saying into play, "Choose a job you love and you will never have to work a day in your life" Though only about 6 more weeks for me.

Was off today but it sorta felt like a workday. Got up at 1000, and talked to my mom for at least two hours. Our conversations tend to last that long, ended up talking about the same things as before, which always has the comedy, and the drama midway through. So did that, and got ready to do some volunteering for setting up for a bazaar the next two days. Ended up staying for an hour since it was pretty much hauling things out to the dumpster back and forth, which feels like an eternity for someone who loves manual labor....not

It was lovely outside, the sun was up and shining. The breeze was just perfect to stroll around the streets, soaking it all in. I sometimes wish I had my loved ones with me, just to share these moments with them. That's not the case though, but that doesn't stop me from looking up and hoping they see the same sun I am. Do you see it?

So hot it hurts...

Nothing much went on today really. Got up and ended up being on the computer for a few hours trying to get iTunes updated. It would add some of my music but not the rest. And despite of me adding them manually, nope, won't add to no avail.

Left today with Caleb around 1630 to go to Shibuya since he wanted a cover to protect his nano from scratch. I was gonna go do the same, buy a newer case for mine since with the current one that I have, I'd have to keep pulling the iPod in and out to try to get to any buttons. But couldn't make up my mind as to what style or color so left empty-handed. Just went to McDonald's to eat afterwards. Figured I'd try something different so opted for Bacon Lettuce Cheeseburger. This is one of those that I haven't seen anywhere else but Japan. It was alright but really didn't get me too full. Well while we were eating, there's this one kid who came in that just shocked us completely. He was really, really tanned, with pink hair along with a cowboy hat dressed in a surfer's outfit. Wowww, was all we could mutter. I think he actually saw us looking through our reflection since moments later, it was his friend this time who just got stood up and started doing some dance moves.

After dinner, we went to the arcade for a little while and played the taiko drum. It only did two songs for us, but it was still fun. Went to Zara to check out the clothes they have but really didn't stay long. I dunno, it just feels weird looking around for outfits when I'm with my friends. They pretty much just stand in one spot and nothing else so really can't take my time to try fitting into some. Zara brand was pretty nice though some of what they have is a bit too expensive. A leather jacket that was like $700! Christ, that's about how much money I make in two weeks and it sure isn't gonna be used to buy one jacket.

Off we went to the Hachiko exit and hang around the station. We really didn't get to talk to anyone today since we both were a bit tired. Just pretty much watching people, and some of the street shows they had, a singing duo in one side and a break-dancing group about 20-ft away. They both ended up being stopped since there was some sort of emergency in one of the lines, and firemen, and an ambulance were called in to respond to a call.


However, what brought amusement to the evening was something written on a guy's shirt. Well, Japan is one among other countries known for engrish and the writings on the shirt just has to bring a smile on your face. But then again, it's the same for shirts that has chinese or japanese writings. People who usually wear them has no idea what is says. Like earlier, there was a poem written in some guy's shirt that started with "It's a good day to die today" and it went on about how the sun is up shining, the trees are green and the flowers abloom. It probably has a meaning when given some thought but it sure is a bit shocking to see those lines on a first glance. Well, back to this one guy that I saw later on the night.His shirt just really made me laugh.I got to take a pic but my friend has it since it's his camera that I used. My friend has sent the picture in. The guy stuck around the train station and I got to take his picture while he was on the phone. I acted like I was taking a picture of the scenery but really was looking at him. One of those moments that I just had to capture, luckily with a camera this time. A picture that'll bring a smile on my face and make me think of how much I enjoyed Shibuya.

It was just a dream...I thought when I got woken up at 0430 this morning. I didn't even hear the phone ringing yet I got up and sure enough there was a message saying we'd need to come in to work. For this phone calls, they pretty much want us to get dressed and go to work which I did, after brushing my teeth at least and doing my hair at least. So off to work I went, though ended up taking a long drive since the gate I normally drive in didn't open until 5 am. Got in to work, signed in and just went back to my shop. Found out eventually that the commander (boss) just wanted to see how fast we'd respond after getting recalled in like that. Is fine with me, though I hope he just wasn't bored enough to come in to work at 4 am and get a kick out of doing that. Probably not, but just getting my hate on.

Really didn't do much at work. I was sorta by myself in our shop since the other two coworkers were teaching a class about what we do and the software tool that we use to get the job done. I remember how excited I was when I just heard about SMS. It's a software that can be used to remote control into somebody else's machine where you can pretty much take over their computer since you can see their view from your side. We use it mostly to help troubleshoot customer's problem. It fascinates some, though the excitement wears off after having had to do it for almost three years now. My bud eventually came back though so that was cool, I had somebody to chitchat with once again. I've hung out with him more and more, and been having a great time on the weekends, just walkin around the city and striking up conversations with people. He got his iPod, well not just any model, but the latest Nano and he was real psyched about it. Nano seems real nice, well it is nice but I settled for the older bigger model instead, when I bought mine few weeks ago. It was that Apple store visit that prompted him to get a Nano since who can really resist to gadgets the Mac people makes. I caved in after resisting buying one for the last year. It wasn't until I got on the train for Kyoto and travelled for 4 hrs without anything to listen to but my thoughts. Time to reflect about things I thought, but that gets boring from time to time. I needed something to enjoy playing with on long travels like this. Sing along to a song, grooving to the music, or being transported back to certain times in my life when some of them were quite known.

So that, after the post office we ended up just going to Burger King for lunch since despite of loving Japanese food as much as we do, we run out of ideas as to what and where to eat. It was good though, I got to try a Sundae pie for the first time. I dunno why, but I just haven't bothered much with whatever desserts this places I eat at has. I'm happy to just go back home and have my dose of cookies and cream. We stuck around BK for a little while, and headed down to the dorms so he can play around with his new gadget. I was tired though so ended up passing out on his floor for a good 20 mins or so since I went to bed around 1230 am and got woken up four hours later. He mentioned I just laid there on the carpet snoring the time away (and all these time I thought I didn't :sigh:) Does anybody else get that? I've always thought I never snored but then again, how would I really know considering I live alone.

We end up going back to work around 1 pm and nothin much went on. We were supposed to go to a briefing with the commander but it got cancelled so I dunno, wasn't too glad about that. I just wanted it to be out of the way but now, it'll have to be done tomorrow morning. I do get nervous after all when it's the superiors that I'd have to give briefings too. Well, higher ranking, though not exactly superior.

We got released at 2 though so glad about that but I ended up calling in to my other job since I was too tired to go. Got home and end up getting on the computer and talking to my cousin for a while which was nice. It's comforting to know that she's always there though I tend not to email her for a few days or so, just so she'd miss me which actually works. I know lame but I do that from time to time, to get the feeling that yeah, I love you enough to realize that we haven't spoken in a few days. I guess living alone does that to people at times. You really wouldn't get any validation in person, so you tend to hold onto the emails, phone conversations, chats with friends to actually feel loved. Right now, those are the big little things I'm holding unto to keep me going.

Fell asleep after that and didn't wake up til about 2020 in which it was too late to catch a movie with my friend. He called before 1900 but I was asleep and didn't call him back til I woke up. Well he lives like less than 10 mins away but the comfort of being in your room is just too good to not go anyplace else. He's messing with his Nano too though, so that's understandable :-) so will let that one slide.

Got to talk to a dear friend of mine for about seven years now so that made my day too. She's in Hawaii and so much has happened in our lives but it's always nice to catch up on things, talk about what's going on, the chances of seeing each other again, and reminiscing of things come to pass. She got me on the reminiscing part though, she kept on and on about the 'spice girls days' Gah, I cringe when I think back to those days in high school we just had to laugh about them now. But what can i say, i loved those girls. They're pretty much what opened me up to listenin to music.

It's almost 1 am now so going to bed now. Got a mention on somebody's blog..eheh, makes me feel like a real deal blogger. Aw heck, thanks Matt! *grins

Have few hours off this morning so figured it'll be a good time to post about what (little) happened yesterday. Pretty much got up, went to work and home. It was nice getting an email from a new friend. Funny how I've told myself I'm gonna stop chatting and yet there I was, trying to make friends with new ones. The email pretty much made my day since I can see the effort that this kid actually sat down and took time in writing me, not those 2-3 sentences that people tend to do these days. I was able to stay happy the rest of the day, considering how hard that is to do with the current job that I have. At times, I'm hoping that it won't be like these for any other jobs I decided to take. I would have quit by now if I was a civilian. But being in the military, sadly we can't just do that. Suck it up as the other people say. Then again, why would you stay somewhere where you feel miserable, try as you might to make the best of it. Life probably isn't always about getting the best of everything, yet you can try at least to get close to it. I wish I can say I'm having the time of my life in the current situation I'm in, but it feels more like i'm doing time. Nothing much went on the rest of the day. Got home, changed clothes and headed out to the plaque shop. There really wasn't much jobs for me to do, so ended up making pins for the halloween. It was nice getting to actually how things are made, I've never given much thought about how those were created until last night. I got to make about 30/40 pins which really isn't bad, doesn't require any thought at all!

After I got off work, I stopped by the cafe and grabbed a sandwich and a chocolate pie for my friend. Got him hooked to Arrested Development and the new episode definitely had us laughing. I liked it better than the part 1. So hang around for a little bit and just went back to the apartment. Got a phone call from my mom though I didn't call her back until three hours later after Edmund called. Just wanted to thank me for sending his digicam and all. He was asking about my visit in Europe to go see him, etc etc which isn't gonna happen. I really can't admit flat out that "Ey, i'm cutting contacts with you. Good luck in everything!" Maybe i can write down the reasons. And then figured I'd call my mom up though I really didn't feel like talking. She sensed it too, and was asking if I was doing alright, or depressed or lonely. And I said not really, I'm fine. She went on how I'm not my usual upbeat self when I talk to her, and just because I don't sound that doesn't mean I'm lonely or depressed. I'm trying to keep myself from sinking down, and it can be hard sometimes, feels like staying happy can be a struggle these days.



I feel real awful at the time that I'm typing this, Wednesday morning at work. I was close to break down crying when the Sgt shook my chair, that I got up and took my water bottle with me, act like I'm gonna get some water, but just went to the restroom and cried a little.

Week was finally over and it's been good. Got to see Everclear, new episode of AD, amongst others. It's Monday though it felt like a Sunday since i was sorta off today. I had to come in to work at 9 last night for some generator load, and didn't leave til about 6/7 hrs later.

Weekend was fun. I hang out with my friend Caleb down at Tokyo. Had to "work" Friday night and got off at around 1930, after which we went to the cafe to grab a bite. Mine being the Smoked salmon as always (don't remember exactly who got me started with it but i sure do love them sandwiches) After dinner, went home to get ready and stepped out to catch the train around 9.
Caleb sure love his brand new digi-cam (i helped pick) which was really just perfect. It's so tiny it doesn't even feel like you have a camera in your pocket. He was snapping away at the train during our trip. It was these two girls that got on who kinda started it. They were wearing cut-off's and I made a comment about never-nudes getting on the train (which is an affliction, there's dozens of them!) Some girls sure try to be different as much as they can, well even boys. You'd see some who's just wayyy tanned beyond reason, it's not even tan at times, it's more like black, along with their dragon ball-z, blonde/platinum hair.

So got to Shibuya, and walked around for a little bit trying to find a place to go after which we settled at a japanese-owned English pub. It wasn't bad, i had a lagger or something. So sat down, talked for a bit. Was going through my phone book, and there was this one phone number that I didn't recognize. So dialled it and some guy picked up after which I just hang up. Smart move, considering this technology known as caller id. Few minutes later, phone was ringing which of course we didn't pick up. The pub got a bit too warm for us, considering we were wearing sweaters so we just left and stopped by a store to grab some chu-hi to get a buzz going.

While at the store, I got a bit hungry so was debating what to eat and saw a picture of a gyudon sandwich style(which is like a rice beef sandwich). You have the beef, sandwiched by two round "slices" of rice. Gyudon is a well-known dish in Japan. The restaurants who serve 'em, Matsuya, Yoshinoya, are sorta fast-foods since people usually just go there during lunch breaks, getting off from work, or munchies after a night out. We just hang around right outside the konbini while we were drinking, and 'avin a snack.

After that, we just walked around for a bit more and sat by the train station. It was pretty much my friend that was chatting up with people that night, since I really didn't feel like it. There really weren't that many people to talk to that night, most of them have been drunk right after getting off from work. It was actually fun to just be there and chill in the city, just watching all the people crossing the main intersection which is known as the busiest in the world. Saw someone cute but pretty much just smiled and didn't say a single word (typical me)

this'll be my permanent blog