Be in the moment

OK, don't drink Mountain Dew when in the evening if you wanna get some sleep on time. I had two cans of it for dinner, and now I'm not sure if it's what's keeping me up or what. It's been a few weeks since I made the move, and I'm glad that I finally get to have a whole weekend off. The past two weekends, I've had to come back down to Hampton to try and take care of some things. I finally got everything moved out of the old apartment, though had some issues with the leasing office last week. Err, what happened was that I didn't give them the rent on the 1st which is normally when the rent is due since they said that the rate for December would be prorated. I dunno what got in my head that they would just bill me all together once they send me the final fee. Unknowingly, they sent me a mail on the first week of December saying that I was supposed to pay rent and I have 'til the 6th to pay rent. Well, with my moving and all my mail getting forwarded, I didn't get the letter until the 13th which was past the newer deadline they set before they'll evict me. I know I'm partially to blame for this, or maybe even the only one at point, but I got a bit angry about how all of this happened. You'd think the accounting office would have checked with the leasing office first and see what's going on, before trying to evict me. They could have called at least, instead of just assuming I'm not gonna pay and just evicting me. Not that it would matter lol, considering I wasn't living there anymore. I'm being apathetic but I'm gonna have to see whether this will affect my standing in any way. I've had to pay attorney's fee and all that junk, but oh well, it's just money. Not that money's not important, but it's not the end of the world now, is it?

With living here for about three weeks, hmm, maybe I've hang out with people like three times this whole time. First was with this guy, D- whose place I crashed at for the night when I came up here to get the lease taken care of, then Ke- an IT professional, and Go- a full time artist. During the week, I've pretty much been trying to get my room organized at least. I didn't have chest drawers or anything at first, so it was hard not having anywhere to put my things in. But now, I got a sofa bed, the chest dressers, and a desk which I'm debating whether or not to keep. It feels like it's taking up more space than it should, and considering I'm just renting a room, gonna find ways to maximize space. I'm in the process of going through my things and sorting them through and pick which to keep or just get rid of. It feels like I have too many things, and really have nowhere to put them, so yea..

Work's been good, though I'm still in the learning stages. I've slacked off here and there, not taking care of issues people called/e-mailed about until after they call again checking what the status is. I kinda zoned out since the past week, my main concern was trying to meet new folks to be friends with in the area. It hasn't gotten to me yet, since I've been busy, but now with having a full weekend here, it'll be nice to spend it with someone. It's good to be alone and all, but sometimes, interacting with fellow humans is more enriching hahaha.

I'm actually enjoying commuting. I have been since I started working and doesn't miss driving much. It's just nice to catch the bus or the metro and observe, watching how people interact, or with some, avoid contact altogether. Keeping a look out on the cute guys too, but I think where I live it's mostly family man that I've seen. Booo! I am sooo moving! If only I like moving hahaha, it's a pain doing it all by yourself. I think I took it too literally when I told the military that I'd do a DITY [Do it yourself] move, I did just that, move everything ALL by myself, with no outside help whatsoever. I was just thinking, You're an idiot for not hiring people. Well when I was getting frustrated packing. Gah, it was such a pain but that's over now, and I did me proud. My mom used to tell me how I was born here in the world alone, and so that's how it usually is. Well she used to tell me that since before, I always had this thing where I HAVE to take somebody with me wherever I go, or whatever I do. I used to equate me being out there by myself as being unloved. But I know that isn't true that just because you're out there alone, you don't have anybody in your life and how lonely that must get.

The roommate's have been good so far, I'll have three in all though the one girl hasn't started living here yet. Need to work on the cleanliness level though. I haven't had time to do a major clean up, so been cleaning up here and there. I was just thinking, Lord! How can they live like this!? Lol, but oh well, I live here now so definitely will fix the cleanliness issue. They're two good guys though, so glad about that at least. Pretty much took my chances, but don't we all, just about everyday? Just gotta have faith that everything will be alright. Still trying to figure out some things but it's all part of the process.

Since last month, I've barely spoken to the family actually. Trying to work on that since with some things, you have to force yourself to do even when you really don't want to. There were some things said to each other when there was really a need for it. Well, my thoughts about the whole mother issue. I love her and all, but I can't help not to question some things anymore. I'm trying to make peace with everything, though with doing that, I feel the need to at least distance myself from all the drama, and start focusing on me. Not that I haven't been, but my dad thinks I oughta . Think about the future son, which I really haven't planned out. Shoot, I might not even be here tomorrow. But just in case I am, yea I need to start planning more :D

I ramble on and on.. Oh, with the commute too, there was actually a blind guy that got on. I admire them, making their way around with the help of the guide dog if that's what those pets are called. Anyway, I just stared there in awe when the dog was guiding the man to the seat in the bus. The man got to sit down, and the dog did the same on the floor of course, in front of the guy and just looking out the driver's view. I seriously wanted to just grab the dog, and hug it. The dog had it's back to where I was sitting, but I dunno, the way that it just sat there, with it's ears down, like it's in a deep thought, 'knowing' what his (or her) purpose was. The love, you can just sense it, if what I'm saying is making sense. It made me smile to have been a witness to something like this.